On audiobooks, rejection, and next steps
On audiobooks When you're reading audiobooks, I don't think it's appropriate only to listen. In order to fully comprehend, you have to keep an outline of the book on a page in front of you. This isn't so you can reference it in the future, though you can do that, too. It's only to keep you paying attention. When you have to summarize each section, you have to pay attention. If you didn't fully understand it, you have to go back. You cannot fake your way through a summary like you did in school. (You're also not doing it for a grade anymore, so you can focus on real learning rather than proving that you read the book.) As you keep the outline, keep it simple. Don't stress yourself having to write each and every idea, but don't put the pen down for too long. Once the pen goes down, your attention seems to wane. If you want to continue to read audiobooks, you'll train yourself to listen, not just to hear.
On rejection Your ability to take rejection must continue to improve. No, I'm not talking about rejection from women, but rejection from the world as a whole. What good is it to be accepted and loved by a world that will die as soon as you will? Therefore, what harm is done to the man who is rejected by other mortal men? Do only what you know to be right and necessary to fulfill that right. Become more attuned to what is right and reasonable according to your governing power. When you act accordingly, you cannot be rejected by anyone because you've already consulted the Most High. Take the same approach in your work. You cannot allow yourself to become discouraged when others don't enjoy your work. Your job is simple: do the best work possible at that given moment. Be aware of when your work is great and when it is bad, and you will be able to fix it. When you put the work out there for others to see, don't perceive rejection as negative but as a tool. It is a mere mechanism by which you can sharpen your skills. It is not an attack—despite the fact it may break down your ability to reason due to your emotional response. But what purpose does that emotional response serve? None.
On next steps You've come to a place, for the first time in weeks, where everything seems to be done. The few projects and tasks you set out for yourself are completed. What next? Don't look to fill your schedule but look to make progress on your larger goal. In recent weeks, this has become more apparent, luckily. You want to live a certain lifestyle and must find ways to get there. What skills must you develop? What will make you happier and more free, rather than busier and more restricted? Follow in the footsteps of freedom, not the path of the vain who chased glory to no end. I'll have to constantly remind you that half of your ambition is wrong. That it comes from other people and not your own motivation to do good work. That's not to say you shouldn't follow it at all, because it may well be good. If it isn't for the right reasons, however, take time to reassess your purpose and end goal. This will keep you putting one foot in front of the other towards a real vision for the future.