On community and initiative
On community The value of being around other people is dependent on how receptive you are to taking in their ideas and viewpoints. You know this to be true because of the cliques you see in the world who are not improving each other but reinforcing their already held beliefs. Plenty of people stay on their side of the aisle at all times so their views are never challenged and therefore they never feel uncomfortable. However, you're as defensive as anybody when you get around people who don't think you're correct. Inevitably, you're not right on everything, so you shouldn't be uncomfortable with that. However, we need to address what you think the remedies are. For one, you could become as intelligent and knowledgeable as possible and be comfortable in all situations because you know you're never wrong. Of course, that's impossible and therefore you shouldn't aim for this at all. In that case, what is your remedy? To be humble. In humility, you are never wrong, only learning. By being a willing and able pupil, other people will feel in control of the situation as they lead you along a better path of understanding. Not to mention, most of the time it will be true that you need their leadership. You're not and never will be an expert on everything—embrace everyone around you as your teacher.
On initiative Much like a chess player will lose a piece for the initiative, or will lose one part of his position for activity, you have to be able to lose all the distractions that tempt you and take control of the reins. You have to stick and move at all times and be single-mindedly focused on your one and only initiative. Consider everything else a problem. Some things you cannot push to completion in one swift motion, because they require time. That's okay, but while you are spending time on those projects, should you not be invigorated make it great? I say this because you completely lost the initiative at all points of the day. You were reactive the entire time and never proactively decided on what you would do. You did not set any goals. You did not take the reins—rather, your impulses, distractions, conversations, entertainment—they all took a hold of you. Escape before it's too late and you realize you've lost an entire day. Do something drastic to change the position and take the initiative back with a force.